I’m not watching the new Star Wars trailer.


I’m not gonna do it. Seriously. I’m going to walk into the theater as fresh as I can (I tend to swim in the pop culture rivers so I’m not certain how successful I’ll be), and enjoy a Star Wars film. For one thing, I absolutely hate spoilers and have gone to some rather extreme lengths to avoid them in the past, but I just don’t need to see a trailer. Sure I’m going to heed Rian Johnson’s warning but I don’t need any more hints about what’s going to happen. It’s a forgone conclusion in my life that I’m going to see this movie. I’ll see the next one too. Here’s the thing. I’m a fan. I’ve been a fan for my entire life. One of the first films that I remember watching was Star Wars. It was a tremendous part of my childhood and continues to be important to me as an adult. When I say that I was a fan, I mean I used to be the fan that George Lucas wanted. I bought the VHS, I bought the toys, I watched the Special Editions in theaters, I got excited for Jar Jar Fucking Binks. I was in hook, line, and sinker.

...and my father thought magazines were stupid

…and my father thought magazines were stupid

That’s not me anymore. I grew up, and I kept watching it. As I got older my perceptions of the films changed. My favorite film shifted from Jedi to Empire. I stopped looking up to Luke. Han became more and more of a scoundrel. Things changed, but my love didn’t. The thing that I came to terms with is that I didn’t love the films for what they are, I loved them for what they meant to me. They kick-started my love of movies. It was fuel for my imagination. It took me to a place where anything could happen.

So that brings me back to the new films. I think that The Force Awakens was exactly what it needed to be. It’s Episode IV for a new audience. It’s restarting the franchise for a new generation. They’re trying to create the type of fans that I was as a kid. The type of fans that buy the merch, that hang on every shred of new footage, that buy books and games and toys and all the other garbage that only such a rich world can provide. I’m already hooked, they don’t need me. I’m going to watch the movie no matter what. Truthfully they would have to severely screw something up for me to not watch the films as they come out.

Back off "Sugar-Tits"

Back off “Sugar-Tits”

At this point, what’s the value of watching a trailer for a film that I’m already excited to see? Will it change my mind about watching the movie? Doubtful. I’m a fanboy, and I don’t want to spoil a damn second of this movie, but mostly I just don’t need to. The only way that I’m going to see a trailer for this movie is if it plays in front of a movie I go to (considering they didn’t use it in front of Blade Runner 2049, I doubt the new trailer will be put out in front of anything else). Really Talk: I don’t even know what the hell a porg is.